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Another year gone by. It was a good one because I am #trulyblessed. But if I’m being honest I don’t remember a single thing I did this year. That’s pretty much how I have felt for the last 6 years. Which is why my main resolution this year is to FOCUS. I want to always know what day and month it is which will be a pretty big lifestyle change.
Since I last posted I sprained my ankle a week after having surgery, had to wear a boot for 3 weeks in the peak of summer, and got an acid photo burn on my hand from a mixture of lime juice and the sun. Too many margaritas and not even SPF makes for another random physical element I suppose.
I should have known the summer wasn’t going to be my peak sexiness on the first day after school ended. I chased a loose receipt all over the parking lot of the grocery store, only to finally catch it and look up to find 6 sexy firemen walking toward me who had seen the whole tragic pursuit.
Back to the present. I am sick of watching tv and sick of drinking wine. I want to read books at night and wake up feeling like a precious innocent. I am actually excited to make healthy changes this year. Apparently there is a maximum amount of Real Housewives and Sauvignon Blanc that someone can enjoy. And I have hit the max. Send book recommendations!
It’s also come to my attention lately that my nose has almost doubled in size since I was in high school. I know there’s no way to change it or reverse it. But I just need you to know that I know.
I think I am going full yoga this year with some cardio free styling. I’ve been trying boot camp classes for years and have finally come to terms with the fact that I am too floppy and too prone to lower back injury to make it enjoyable. I love yoga and it makes me feel like I can live a long life with fewer aches and pains and more positive vibes. So that’s what I am going to do!
I also resolve to never run again. I tried once this year and I honestly didn’t remember how to do it. Every single part of my body was jiggling and it just wasn’t good for my psyche or the general morale of the neighborhood. I don’t even like to watch other people run. I feel like I get a new cluster of spider veins every time someone even jogs by me.
I would also like to say I am going to play more pickup games of basketball. There is a 0% chance this will actually happen but something about a casual game of B-ball with a few strangers excites me greatly.
This is pretty unrelated to the new year but I truly believe that loose BBQ sauce should not be photographed. I like it just fine on a nice piece of chicken but don’t put that sauce on tv running down a sandwich. It’s too thick and it’s disgusting.
That’s all I got for now! Happy New Year to all!
