Do you ever feel like your mind and your body aren't on the same page? I do!
Due to Jack's all encompassing hatred for his carseat, whenever we are out and about I am basically in constant fear that he is going to freak out and I'll have to abandon my missions. That usually leads me to be very hot, sweaty, and nervous when on the town. And almost always a little distracted too.
Today I went to the gym for a class. Jack was tear free for the car ride there, the whole entire time I was "taking my exercise" (as my grandfather used to say), and even when I put him BACK in the carseat, which is usually the time he really lets the screams out.
I decided I was going to take advantage of this amazing opportunity to go to Harris Teeter and get him some prune juice. The poor little lad has been having some very painful stomach problems in the last few days.
He was wonderful the whole time we were at the store. I even took the time to order a sandwich! I was getting so carried away. It was wonderful.
And then I knocked down an entire display of 2 gallon Gold Peak Iced Tea when I gingerly lifted one bottle off to take home with me. Boo boo to my foot that it fell on. Gaping wound to my pride as I stood there with a stunned baby, a fallen wooden shelving display, and lots and lots o' tea.
The manager kept asking me again and again if I was OK. It was not totally unlike this experience at Outback Steakhouse.
Needless to say, that little ordeal had me just a wee bit flustered. So naturally I checked out with my groceries in the self checkout, too embarrassed to interact with actual humans, grabbed my receipt, and then left all of my groceries on the counter and got into my car.
So whenever you think you are alone in your mind-body disconnect, just remember there's always some other idiot in Wilmington making it rain iced tea and leaving her overly-confident groceries at the store.
*Obviously I went back for my groceries after I realized my mistake. I wasn't going to leave a perfectly good sandwich abandoned, no matter how embarrassed I was!
I'm with Stupid" is a hilarious and clever concept that brings laughter to all who encounter it. It's a light-hearted way to poke fun at ourselves and embrace the joy of humour. A brilliant and witty creation that never fails to bring a smile.
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